if i die tomorrow

Spotify recommended me Beenzino’s song I’ve never heard before. It’s titled If I Die Tomorrow. It made me want to write these words.

What if after this non-sugared cup of coffee
my life unravels slowly
As I stroll under the 4pm sunlight
Thinking it might be last time I bathe in gold

I remember the smell of the bookstore
My father used to take me to
The two of us against mountains of books
He watched over me while I ran through aisles

Sleeping at noon in my mom’s cuddle
I used to count to a hundred before sneaking away
Now between all this hustle
I wish I was her daughter who obey

Big sis, I always misunderstand her
Her mind is a place I’ve never been
What does love mean to her?
Why did she marry the man who thinks mom’s mean?

My big brother watched me cried one day
He said I can’t always be a victor
Yet without bother, he stayed
Washed away my sorrow over dinner

If I die tomorrow, I know my life isn’t my own
I hope the rain will hit the roof
Wash away all sorrow, make my presence known
So mother know I am in every drop

Will I be able to answer the questions?
About who I pray to?
About what was let through between these lips?
About what I’ve seen with these two eyes?

If I die tomorrow,
in the end life is a tunnel
Which I walk alone
.
.
.
right?